I have determined that everyone is doing the best they can at the present time. I have also reached a conclusion that I cannot change that which is not mine to change. I cannot keep asking someone to be who they can’t be at this time. It doesn’t work. I don’t have control over any one, except myself. To be quite honest, there are times I don’t have control over me. It doesn’t matter how much I want someone to grow, to be all that he can be. I cannot set goals for other people. I cannot make any one do any thing they do not choose to do.
I wanted to work with someone I had come to respect and had a positive connection with. I knew things were missing that needed to be there-certain skill sets. I worked hard to produce resources. I gave out lots of information to explain the situation. I read books, trying to find answers that would help. I tried every thing humanly possible to make the situation work while battling an illness. I never tried so hard in my life to make something happen. I wanted to resolve some issues so I could leave my past behind. I came to the realization that sometimes, the past can be so powerful that it can prevent progress from occurring. I was convinced the kid,who came from the ghetto, could do any thing if she just worked hard enough.
I am finally learning that circumstances can prevent success regardless of the time and effort involved. I am learning to accept other people’s limitations as well as my own.
Sometimes life does not support you in getting what you want. God does not always answer your prayers. You have to come to the painful realization that you have to give up. You have to stop hitting a brick wall. You have to let go no matter how much it hurts. You have to find a way to admit to yourself that you did the best you could. He did the best he could, but this was impossible to do, given the circumstances. The little voice inside is saying: It’s time to let go.